"Not the needle, nor the thread, the lost decree. Saying nothing, that's enough for me."
Woods by paumatias
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January 2010 February 2010 April 2010 May 2010 June 2010 July 2010 August 2010 September 2010 October 2010 November 2010 December 2010 January 2011 February 2011 March 2011 April 2011 May 2011 August 2011 September 2011 October 2011 November 2011 December 2011 January 2012 February 2012 March 2012 April 2012 May 2012 June 2012 July 2012 August 2012 September 2012 October 2012 November 2012 December 2012 January 2013 February 2013 March 2013 April 2013 May 2013 July 2013 August 2013 October 2013 January 2014 March 2015 August 2015 July 2017 March 2019
I knew it. I am not that good of a cheerleader to even think I have the slightest chance of getting in the most coveted squad. I still feel all the envy and regret. All the flashbacks that still eat me up every second that pass. I can feel the sweat dripping down the sides of my ears, exactly how it fell a year ago. I cannot be more depressed. I told myself that I wouldn't let this thing pass through me. But I cannot help it.
It's the feeling of wanting something yet it never happened or maybe never will happen. It's very remorseful. I know I could have done better, I just know it. But I won't force myself into something I know is just not meant for me. I know now that I am way better than all the failures and rejection that have stabbed me in the face. I know that all these mishaps have their own purposes. I know that something bigger and better is waiting for me just around the corner. I know that there's no sunshine at the end of the rainbow, because I always hope it would rain since I hate the heat anyway. Haha.
At least now I am learning to move on and live past that odd memory. I cannot get any more proud than this. I deserve to be happy, in the least.
Labels: misery